(A: Phone call #1, standard drone filters)

Loike people's been saying, last year the town sent out a census, people were then given assoignments t' kill each other; I was there when it 'appened, and I 'eard something similar 'appened th' year before that. Wotever decision you end up making is up t' you, but if you want t' learn your way around a gun or get in some target practice, I've got a shooting gallery set up at th' Rec Center and I'm available t' give you pointers in th' afternoon once school is out.

And if you want t' argue with me about 'ow wrong it is or wotever, don't bother. I'm not interested in talking philosophy or morals in a place where regular ethics would never apply, even when something 'orrible isn't going on.

(B: Rec Center. Sniper is making an inventory of the guns and ammunition he has there, as well as cleaning out the ones that get used more often. He has pretty much everything available for sale in Mayfield, and an exotic weapon or two.)

(C: Phone call #2, filtered to canonmates minus a certain BLU asshole.)
If they don't 'ave us off each other, I think it'd be worth it to band t'gether. Th' 'ospital's prolly too big a place t' try t' take even as a group, so wot about moi place? I've got enough supplois t' feed us all for some toime if we 'ole up in there, and plenty 'f guns and ammo besoides. Any family you got that you want t' take with you is welcome if they can take orders and not get in th' way.

(So what happens when a 1965 Land Rover Camper Van gets possessed by Mood Slime?

Cue early morning wacky antics as the vehicle demonstrates just how all-terrain it is. Your mailbox? Just got knocked over. Your lawn? Has tire tracks in it. Your flashy red sports car, parked in the driveway? Crushed like your childhood dreams.

Trying to keep up with this mess is the mortified owner of said vehicle, giving little heed to things like privacy or using doors as he barrels through your house--via the windows if he must--so he doesn't get almost run over a second time.)

(As a teenager, Harold David Mundy was living a double life: on one hand, he was an obedient son, getting top marks in preparation to becoming a doctor like his father wanted because his parents were convinced that he was too scrawny and fragile for the physically demanding jobs; on the other, he was sneaking out to spend weekends in the bush trying to prove to himself that he could handle himself just fine.

This would have only been a footnote in the Sniper's life if he'd stuck to cooking his own meals, but he'd grown lazy again and started eating what the drone wife put on the table.

Long story short, there's now a grown man in tribal facepaint wearing nothing but a loincloth skulking about in your back yard. And he's even worse at being stealthy than he would be otherwise.

At least he isn't armed at all this time.)

(He tried to live with having super-effective microscopic-level sight, he really did. But doing so left him with tunnel vision so severe that he might as well have been blind and the constant sensual overload was giving him horrible migraines.

At least the insides of his eyelids were still dark, so until he could see normally again, the Sniper will be attempting to go about his business wearing a blindfold and carrying a makeshift walking stick.)

A: Anywhere
(He's obviously slower on foot than he otherwise would be and unable to see, but the Sniper's other senses are fairly sharp. And, of course, about eleventy billion times even more paranoid than he was before. At least this time all he has is a slim bit of wood.)

B: Mayfield High
(The Sniper is navigating the halls using his janitorial push cart to test the path in front of him. Every so often he bumps into the walls on either side, or possibly a person.)

C: Phone call
(You can hear the sounds of the Sniper attempting to treat himself while blind and left-handed, the combination of both meaning that it's not working very well.) I could use th' services 'f a doctor, preferably one with actual medical training.

(So guess who's been on edge ever since the sirens and is doing a rather piss poor job of skulking around stealthily while armed with his Huntman?)

((OOC: The Sniper is not easily sneaked upon unless you have super-human powers and he's very paranoid right now, so go ahead and start tagging as if he's just fired an arrow in your general direction. Totally requesting somebody actually letting themselves getting shot, it'd make for an awesome first impression.))